Apr 23 2016

A good girlfriend can never be a good wife!

It had been a bad week for Aditya**. He had recently gotten engaged to a Delhi girl and was all set for a December wedding. But now based on the Devdas mode on his twitter feed, it seemed like the wedding was off!

Trouble in Paradise?

There was an ominous cloud hanging over the room last evening when Adi came over for a drink. It was clear he was in foul mood and needed to talk! Turns out his girlfriend was getting engaged to some Guwahati based dude and this had put him into a depression.

“Hmm! So the wedding is off?” I innocently ask.

“No!! That’s in December!” he answers without batting an eyelid.

I was perplexed, so Adi explained the situation in some detail. Long story short: Adi got engaged to his former colleague ‘D’ -arranged by his parents – even though he hadn’t quite broken up with his girlfriend of 4 years: ‘S’. I had wrongly assumed all along that the engagement was with his long time girlfriend. ‘S’ soon found out and proceeded to get hitched to a man her parents chose for her. And news of her engagement put our man in a very foul mood indeed! Aaah! Mystery solved!

GB: “Do you love ‘D’?”

Adi: “Well, I like her! She is from my caste, gets along well with my mother and people say we look good together! perfect Wife material.”

GB: “Hmmm! So then get married to ‘D’! Whats the problem?’

Adi: “But I love ‘S’!”

Quite a conundrum eh?! Adi has chosen to get married to someone else, and ‘S’ then decided to move on and get married as well. What was the problem again? Well, the problem is, our man wants to get married to ‘D’ AND continue his “relationship” with ‘S’! In short – Adi wants to have his cake and eat it too!

Adi met ‘S’ through common friends more than four years back and they have been soulmates since. Infact I don’t any know any other couple who are so meant for each other. Adi still says he loves ‘S’ more than ever! But he cannot get married to her! And why not?

यार! अच्छी Girlfriend कभी अच्छी बीवी नहीं हो सक्ती! ‘S’ is a great girlfriend but she cannot be a wife!”.

This brand of assholery is hardly unique! Many guys have a very preset notion of the kind of girl they want to marry and the kind of girl they want to date! Problem is that these are 2 different kinds of girls in their mind!

I would congratulate ‘S’ for taking the right decision and moving on! There is no reason she should continue keeping her life on hold for a selfish guy who clearly doesn’t give a shit to anything beyond himself!

I was ‘S’ for 2 years of my life – so I fully understand and applaud her position!

I believe that People who are meant to be together, should make every effort to be together – that sort of thing doesn’t happen automatically. If either of you cannot do that for whatever reason (including your own assholery), then its best for both to just make a clean break and get on with your lives!

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